THE LAST WATER BENDER.

“Knock knock.”

“Who is it?”, I reply in my normal ‘plix go to your room’ voice.

“It's me.”

“This ‘me’ wey dey knock all the time sef”, I mutter to myself as I unlock the door and swiftly swing it open.

“Good morning. I'm sorry if I woke... ”

“No oh, I wasn't sleeping oh. I was even about to come and open the door sef. Don't be”, I abruptly reply. Izz nor me that this fine fish will pass by.

Ewuchim oo, plix ehn, all this beauty is it for one person or for you and your sisters to share? Na there and then, I realise say you dey vex be say fine girl never knock for your door for morning. As sharp shooter wey I be, man gats shoot en shot in any way possible so I proceed to ask her in;

“Please come in, dear, so I can shut the door. Mosquitoes here work even during their leisure hour.”

“Heh, thanks but I'm just here to borrow your fetcher.”, she quickly responds.

I think to myself: Ahn, only fetcher? Plix can I fetch you some of my loving too while at it? In fact, can we fetch each other forever bikonu?
Thank God mind reading isn't an actual thing.

“I was about going down to fetch water myself. Why don't you wait a second while I get the fetcher and my gallon.”

“Okay”, she goes, as she proceeds to sit on my 35k mattress. I'm happy.

My drums are filled up but a wise man once said “half empty and half full are like saying potato and potato”, so I quickly trip and voila, my drum is half filled. There's water everywhere but a little wetness never killed anyone.

We get to the well and I fill up all the gallons. Contact me for your fairly used watering cans.

I insist on carrying both our gallons while she holds on to the fetcher and funnel. I can do this. I've been training for this day.


Meanwhile, she lives on the 3rd floor and I, myself, on the 1st, but what is distance but a measure of space, so I flex my biceps up until the 3rd floor. Ooh, I know she wants me right now.

We get to the door and she thanks me but I insist on finishing what I started, so she lets me take it into the kitchen after much hesitation and grammar.

“Chairman, how far na?”, I proceed to greet the Uncle lying on her three deck in bed like he owns the place.

“Your brother looks like you oh”, I say to her, in an attempt to console myself as I leave the room. She smiles, leans forward and whispers to me, “That's my boyfriend.”

I realise the 3rd floor to the 1st floor is far. She's not even that fine and it seems the only thing wet right now is my room.

No, I'm not crying oh. It's the pepper and onions from the Indomie she was cooking.


Written by Tuzy for Awestafricangirl.